Kailey Elizabeth Adams, born this day 21 short years ago!
I'm going to take you back to a September morning in 1989 (I do not remember the exact date...I was only 6 and exact dates didn't matter to me then), a morning that I'm sure was like most mornings for my typical 6 yr old self. I'm sure I awoke grumpily, thumping down the steps while wiping sleep out of my eyes, and plopping myself in front of the tv to catch an episode of Gumby and My Little Ponies while the madre was probably trying to make me get moving. What was different that morning is that the madre told me she would have a present awaiting me when I returned from school! I just knew in my heart of hearts I was getting the Barbie doll I had been begging for. The Loving You Barbie (I tried uploading an image with no success...surprise surprise). I'm sure that I was bragging to all my friends at recess about my present that was waiting for me at home.
I remember getting off the school bus, the anticipation building...I remember climbing up the steps of our back porch and meeting the madre at the door searching her hands for a rectangular shaped box wrapped in pretty paper. No box! Instead she told me to look in her purse for my present. Good thinking madre...add to the suspense by putting it in your purse. She was good like that. No box! I'm pretty sure I gave her the what the hell look when I didn't see my precious Barbie. Instead she pulled out a picture and to me it looked like a black and white blob. You can imagine my disappointment...I felt like a balloon that deflated. That is until she told me what that black and white blob meant!
Let's back it up a little more. I was 6 at this point and as far back as my memory can take me I had wanted a brother or sister. Okay, so I really wanted a brother, but this is because my best friends were boys and I thought they were so cool! I remember asking the madre when I was going to get one and praying every night. I'm sure I told God that I would be a good girl if he gave me a brother or sister. I always liked being around babies and younger kids than me. I liked being older and "in charge".
So, when the madre told me that I was going to be a big sister my balloon filled right back up...so much so that it was near bursting. I finally got my wish...my prayer was answered! I loved my brother/sister so much even if he/she was just a blob. I was SO proud of that picture and it was the best surprise the madre ever gave me.
Fast forward to when this cute little girl came into the world. I was so proud to be her big sister. I made the madre bring her to my class for show and tell...true story! I couldn't wait to show her off to everyone! I did not like actually sharing her though because I thought she was all mine. Most of her baby pictures are of me holding her. I think the madre may have one or two of just them and the madres head is cut out...I was a lousy photographer. I even tried to get her to call me mommy when she started to talk. Can you say obsessed?
Growing up 7 years apart wasn't always peaches and cream. I didn't always want her around when I neared my teenage years and there were times when I was down right awful to her. Don't worry, she has paid me back! There are times when I act too much of the mother role and not enough of the big sister role. I am working on this! However, the one constant is the amount of love I have for my baby sister.
~Kailey... I am so thankful that God chose me to be your big sister. It is such a rewarding role in my life and I can only hope that as the years continue our bond will grow stronger. I know that my motherly tendencies drive you bat shit crazy, but I have a fierce love for you. I worry because I love. I push because I love. I want the very best that life has to offer and I want you to want that for yourself!
You are approaching an exciting time in your life! Forget the whole legally being able to drink...you've been sneaking (not successfully by the way) the madres booze for some time now ;) The exciting part is you are at an age where you can EXPLORE and make exciting things happen for your life. You have nothing holding you back from travel and discovering who you are!
I want to leave you with words of wisdom and inspire you in some way. I'm afraid I can't think of anything at the moment. Just remember this...don't be afraid of the mistakes you will make in life, take these as growing experiences. Don't be afraid to dig deep and ask yourself "what do I want from this life?". Then don't be afraid to do whatever it takes to make it happen! Remember that you can't make everyone happy with your life choices...just worry about making yourself happy! Don't live your life in the past...whatever you do don't do that. Our past wasn't always pretty, but it made us who we are today! If you spend your time in the past you won't be able to create your future.
I love you more than you will ever know boo! You are my best answered prayer.
"A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost."
On a side note: I never did get that Loving You Barbie...
love this!
ReplyDelete